Playing the Rejection Game

What Are You Willing to Attempt to Become More Resilient?

Many of us fear rejection.

Sometimes we fear rejection to the point that we don’t take the initiative — to apply for the promotion, to initiate a new project, to be open to new possibilities — because there is the chance we could fail.

Based on the DISC assessment, we know those who are high in Dominance (D) are more likely to be risk takers.

Still, no one likes rejection. But can lessons learned about rejection help us become more self-aware and change how we approach decision-making?

Jia Jiang desperately wanted to be an entrepreneur. He had a dream and many great ideas, but was having trouble landing the necessary funding to make them happen. Time (and money) was running out.

Because chasing your dream requires you to put everything out there and deal with the consequences, Jiang realized his fear of rejection was a bigger obstacle than any actual rejection.

Ultimately, he wanted to find a way to deal with rejection without it destroying him, so he embarked on a now-memorable social experiment to curb this irrational anxiety.

In 2012, Jiang initiated his “100 Days of Rejection Therapy” experiment, where he willfully sought out rejection on a daily basis.

From requesting a lesson in sales from a car salesman (“no”) and asking a flight attendant if he could make an announcement on the PA system (“yes”) to his famous request of asking a Krispy Kreme worker to create a donut in the shape of the multi-colored Olympic rings ("yes").

Ultimately, Jiang learned that even the most preposterous request may be granted if you ask in the right way, pick the right targets, and focus on how to turn an initial rejection into a positive.

Those who are successful in sales know it’s a numbers game.

Your prospects won’t always say “yes,” and your boss won’t, either. Your mission, then, is to make many requests (some audacious and some not) and gain lots of experience in the process so you can feel rejection and move past it to success.

Whether that means a trying to attain a new job or a new home loan, the answer will certainly be “no” if you don’t make the effort to get (earned or otherwise) a “yes.”

What are you willing to attempt today to make yourself more resilient? How can a silly request that may very well be turned down lead to something you ultimately attain?